uh-oh. 4 more days.

To Be Able

Sometimes I wish to speak and write well, but I can’t. Sometimes I wish to love right, but I can’t.
Sometimes I wish this and that, but still I can’t.
Do you see? If you are like me and you wish and you can’t, we can- with His strength.
Only with His strength we can.
To speak and write, and to be understood with our weak words. To act in perfect love. And to do this and that.

The Time Is Starting...

yupz....

friends are starting to go back. and i mean going back for good.

i dont know when i am going to see them again. i dont know if i will get to see them again.

the worst thing is, i feel like i havent give them enough hugs today.

Cant Believe This is Happening

look at this!

i thought this only happens in Enid Blyton's story books....... heh.

o gosh... it was forecasted to be 3-10 cm, but now it's wayyy thicker than tt. victoria is looking like rockies all over......................

=)))))

christie, i am jumping ard and making snowballs and am going to make snowman later. hee. will take lotsa pics!!!!!! =)

it's snowing in Victoria, right now right outside my house!!!!!!!!! yay!!!!!!! heh. victoria rarely had snow, and the last snow they had was i think 2 or 3 yrs ago. i am looking out of my window and they are just falling abundantly from the sky....

it'll be cold today. =)

Have You Heard of the band MercyMe?

wil has the first 2 CDs, and the songs are good. i jus bought the latest one called "Coming Up to Breathe". havent really got the chance to listen to it, but i can already say that i like them more than before...

"I remember going swimming with my brother when I was a kid. We would always get into a major wrestling match in the water to see which one could take the other under. Even to this day, if we get into a pool together... LOOK OUT! Being five years younger, it seemed like I was always the one forced to see how long I could hold my breath underwater because he was so much stronger than me. Sometimes we would get carried away and my broher would hold me underwater for a little too long, and I would start to panic. I'll never forget that feeling of needing air, desperately reaching out for something to pull myself with. I may have only been under it for a few seconds, but when I surfaced, I gasped for air like it was the first time I had ever breathed. Looking back, all I can say is, nothing has changed. Even to this day, I still struggle with keeping my head above water. The circumstance may be a little different, but the urgency to breathe is very much the same.

These days the things that hold us down look different than my big brother in a swimming pool. For most of us, we carry the weight of wanting to live up to other people's expectations, and this can be a hard burden to bear. Sometimes we succeed and other times we fail, but the weight of expectations can hold any of us down and overwhelm us. This is just as true for people who make music and want to share it with the world.

For us in MercyMe, some days we feel the expectations of our families. Some days it is the expectations of our ministry or the music industry. Other days we wonder if a song we've written will be embraced by our listeners, or if people will want to come see one of our concerts. It is days like these when we sometimes forget God's expectations of us.

Thankfully, God's expectations are quite different than people's. God doesn't expect us to always please others. God doesn't expect us to write a hit song. God doesn't expect us to change hearts or save the world- that is His job. God simply asks us to be faithful and do the best with what He has given us. He desires us to simply reflect His goodness, His glory and His grace to the watching world. When we are able to stop and realize what God requires of us, all the weight of others' expectations seems to melt away.

What you hold in your hands is the result of MercyMe surfacing... surfacing from our concern for what others might think of us, and allowing ourselves to come up for air, catch our breath and breathe deep the grace and freedom of God.

The music and message of this album is all over the place and we love it! There are songs that go deeper than we have ever gone before, and there are songs that are as shallow as some of the swimming pools my brother and I wrestled in. And the good news is... it is OK! This is who we are, blemishes and all. Our prayer is that this project will somehow draw you closer to Christ, whether through an intimate time of worship, or through the joy of knowing it is OK to have fun. The bottom line is, it would do us all some good to find ourselves... Coming up to Breathe."

- Bart Millard, from MercyMe, on "Coming Up to Breathe".

Still I Notice You

Every Season
by Nichole Nordeman

Every evening sky, an invitation
To trace the patterned stars
And early in July, a celebration
For freedom that is ours
And I notice You
In children’s games
In those who watch them from the shade
Every drop of sun is full of fun and wonder
You are summer

And even when the trees have just surrendered
To the harvest time
Forfeiting their leaves in late September
And sending us inside
Still I notice You when change begins
And I am braced for colder winds
I will offer thanks for what has been and was to come
You are autumn

And everything in time and under heaven
Finally falls asleep
Wrapped in blankets white, all creation
Shivers underneath
And still I notice You
When branches crack
And in my breath on frosted glass
Even now in death, You open doors for life to enter
You are winter

And everything that’s new has bravely surfaced
Teaching us to breathe
What was frozen through is newly purposed
Turning all things green
So it is with You
And how You make me new
With every season’s change
And so it will be
As You are re-creating me
Summer, autumn, winter, spring

I saw my first snow

and I am overwhelmed.

Went to Rocky Mountains for the past 4 days, and it was beEeaAAuuuUtifUl... we went to different mountains and lakes and little towns, and the combination was lovely! i was trying to read my notes for my coming exam (in 2 days), but i couldnt take my eyes off the window, so i just gave up reading altogether.

snow is amazing. i love rain, but snow is really something different. when i first see it fall, it was so quiet, i couldn't even hear a thing, and it just caught me by surprise. and when it first fall on me, it felt so dry and clean, i could just brush it off with my bare hands. we saw even more snow at the lakes and the higher altitudes. i could just pick up a handful of them and toss them back into the air, i could just eat it off the branches and taste the coldness!

snow is so soft and pure... and delicious.... and white. i was just telling ping that snow gave me the same feeling that old castles have... it's not fun like spring and summer like a princess, but more elegant like a Queen.

in every season there is a time, in every time His beauty is showcased. in the first morning i asked "God, show off your beauty k!" and He really didnt hold back at all.... thank You!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! =)

Hearing the First Rain of Autumn

and much more...

God never leave me at any time. He teach me numerous lessons, as few or as many as He thinks is best, and at the times He thinks is best. He knows me better than myself, and He is teaching me to know Him- my God, my father, my friend, my lover, my romancer. He loves me like mad. and I am learning to love Him like mad.

First Post in Victoria

i am in victoria!!!!!!!!!! heh. been here for a few days already, and i like what i see so far.
flowers along the streets... in pple's lawns... they are so bright and colourful! the air smells sweet... and the wind feels great. it gets chilly at night though, so i have to wear a sweater. the people are frenly in general, really helpful.. one of the things tt impress me the most is victoria's accessibility for the physically disabled. there is a club in campus called Access UVic. (uvic= university of victoria). and there's so much support going on for this cause!
in sgp i will see maybe 1 or 2 physically disabled pple in a few days. here, i get to see a few of them in 1 day. i wondered why there are more disabled pple here than in sgp at first. then i realised... maybe its not that we have less of them in sgp.. but maybe they jus dun go out as often on the streets bcus its so difficult to move ard for them. you know the stairs that we have to walk up each time we go up the bus? yupz.. here that stairs is moveable. so when there's anyone who's wheelbound coming up the bus, the driver will push a button which move the stairs, and beneath is a smooth platform for the wheels. great rite? =)

i am enjoying myself here. got my first hitch-ride.. i was jus putting out my hand for fun, and was so surprised that the guy actually stopped for us! heh. went around to so many different places to hunt for a house...n we finally found a place yesterday.

hey thanks for sending me to airport that day. i know you guys have to wake up super early, some of you have to go back to sch, and have to travel from east to west again. really appreciate it. =) i will try to post the pic we took that day, i am not sure how yet.. heh but i will find out somehow... christie yinghui ching elaine, so sad we couldnt meet up beforehand! the last day in sgp was pretty hectic with all the last min shopping and packing. =( take care okay? and i din get to meet up with so many others. you all take care too!

well... in the midst of all the fun.... i am homesick to be honest. =) there's no sense of familiarity here. i am still trying to get to know the other 2 gals frm smu.. the daily routine here is different, and i still haven find a comfort zone. i miss the people whom i can be comfortable with back at home. but i know i jus need more time to adjust. sometimes i feel lonely and foreign. but thank God God is with me. so i am not alone. =)

Why I Like Him and His Writings

TO LUCY BARFIELD

My Dear Lucy,

I wrote this story for you, but when I began it I had not realized that girls grow quicker than books. As a result you are already too old for fairy tales, and by the time it is printed and bound you will be older still. But some day you will be old enough to start reading fairy tales again. You can then take it down from some upper shelf, dust it, and tell me what you think of it. I shall probably be too deaf to hear, and too old to understand, a word you say, but I shall still be

your affectionate Godfather,
C. S. Lewis.

- C.S. Lewis on writing The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe.

A Beautiful Moment

i stood still in the crowd outside the stadium on wednesday, in awe of fireworks. it's so amazing how they can change into different colours in split seconds, and how each star that is shot can burst into a million other starlets into the sky. i love its every moment.

in my fascination, i exclaimed:"who invented fireworks? they are so smart!!!"
and while i was full of praise for the scientist or engineer of whoever that came up with this, He reminded of the wonders of the ultimate creator of all things. praise Him! =)

My Wandering Heart

the heart is like a butterfly. she flutters from flower to flower in the court, trying to seduce the sweetness within. then finds herself sipped in the routine.
the heart is more foolish. the creature finds host in its Eden, unlike her who tries to satisfy her self elsewhere.

" O to grace how great a debtor
Daily I'm constrained to be
Let Thy goodness like a fetter
Bind my wandering heart to Thee
Prone to wander Lord, i feel it
Prone to leave the God i love
Here's my heart, O take and seal it
Seal it for Thy courts above
Here's my heart, O take and seal it
Seal it for Thy courts above"

taken from Come Thou Fount Of Every Blessing,
words by Robert Robinson.

Before I Sleep

yesterday pastor said that there are many careless words and emails that he wished he could take back.

me too.

sometimes i really wished that i can take back my words. esp those that are said when i was guarding my pride. or when i was too full of myself.

one reason why i haven blogged is cus the internet is really slow in indo and it will jus cut its connection whenever it pleases. so i was too impatient to write anything up here. the other reason is cus i jus din know what to write. or maybe i knew, but i was too lazy to proof-read them. it always takes time to decide whether each entry is okay. no point publishing things tt are not beneficial. but even those are fine. its still okay if words are not beneficial in any way, as long as it doesnt harm. the worst kind of words are when they harm. so be careful with them. i dun mean be careful when someone say harmful stuffs to you. i mean be careful not to say harmful stuffs to others.

k la.... so this post may not be beneficial to you. haha tts very fine. just hoping that it doesnt harm God in any way.

good nitez, slp tite........

o ya, i haven talked about my trip back in indo... it was really fun... =) and i had a really good time with my family... not just my immediate family, but my uncles aunts cousins etc. got to know things i never knew about them. when i thought i already know them so well!
hmmz i shant say how much weight i have gained. but just that i ate so much for each meal, that i still feel full even when its time for the next meal. but i still had to eat. so i ate while i was full, then i was super full by the end of it. so by the next next meal i am still full, but i still have to eat. and so on. so different from Gundap right.... yupz... food is really good in indo... but family is best! =)

good nite again..... chOc DrEamZ......... =)

10 Days 9 Nights

Those 10 days only fill up 31 pages of my small little journal, but i hope it will bear more significance than mere papers flipped back and forth for reading pleasure.

Living Conditions
I was told that the place is called Ape, a part of Tanjung Gundap. The people live in wooden houses on the water shores. I can feel the tide beneath my bed at night (during the first night i mistook the sounds of the waves as someone washing clothes throughout the night), and heavy rain sounds like waterfall against the attap!

There is no aircon, no water heater, no laptop... there would be no electricity by now. it's on only from 6pm till 10pm, approximately 4 hours each day. At 6 when the generator starts to hum, those who have tv will turn them on and start to watch.. of all things... indian shows!! they love bollywood. in my house is posters of Jesus and the cross, and next to that are posters of bollywood actors and actresses.

Water is drawn from the well every morning, and dirt can still be seen in the water. so i try very hard to sift them when i bath... heh don't ask me how...

The food is good. spicy most of the time, and i loved most of it. Dishes will depend on their catch for that day. It was the first time i tried sea turtle!! i saw how it was slaughtered alive before my very eyes.... before it was served for my lunch and dinner.

I also get to travel to other islands by pompong... learnt how to row sampans, but my poor friend didnt want to sit in the same boat again after i tried rowing.

Oh and i just have to add that there's a cat in Gundap who's an exact copycat of garfield. fat... lazy... and so adorable!

The People
It is queer. Everyone was connected to everyone else. Father A is son of Mother B who is sister of Lady C who is cousin of Brother D who is stepbrother of Sister E who is daughter of Grandmother F and so on. And there's so much adoptions going on! A family can have more than 10 children, but extremely many did not survive various illnesses. So only a few are left in each family, and these are mixed with other children adopted from their sibling's or neigbour's.

Aside from this complication, the people there are really simple... and they are really kind.

The family who adopted me only had one bed at home which belongs to the son. but they gave it to me while i was there... yupz... imagine me on bed, and the rest of them sleeping on the floor.

The daughters cooked my meals, which usually means rice with a side dish. On the 3rd night, i realised one of the girls was eating rice only with sambal... i asked her why. she said there's not enough food, smiled and said its ok, and that it's normal. imagine again... her eating rice and sambal... whilst half an hour ago i just ate rice with a proper side dish. i didn't dare to eat much after that...

A New Song
In the mornings before lessons began, the children get to sing 10 songs of their choice. I love listening to them. They have such joyful voices!
We learnt alot of new songs from them... like "Aku Teko Kecil", "Aduh Aduh...", and such. i like the move-alongs!! =P

Here's my favourite:
"Kasih Yesus
indah indah o indah!
Kasih Yesus
indah indah o indah....

Lebih indah dari pelangi
Lebih indah dari bunga di taman
Lebih indah dari bintang di langit
O Yesus ku!"

His love is lovely. more lovely than the rainbows, than the flowers in the fields, and the stars in the sky, is He my Jesus! =)

A New Prayer
I love the children's prayers too. they pray like kids! so bold before God and before us. short and simple prayers uttered so well... i also want to pray like that! with sincerity and without pretense. without fear of barriers in indo language. =P

The Team
The team consists of 9 of us.

There's a girl who hates dogs, cats, and i think almost any animal. she also doesnt like to climb around the areas. yet she is willing to come.
There's another girl who loves kids. she has such an abundant lot of energy! she can just play with the kids for aaall daaay looong..............................................
There's a guy who's so skilled with photography. i fell in love with many of his pictures. he said something that reminded me that this is God's work, and not ours. to God be the glory, not us.
There's another guy who can really draw..... sing.... and do so many other things!
There are guitar players...
One guy uses magic tricks to share Christ! and oh he do indian dance too.
One guy was writing notes and rehearsing his speech so seriously...
Another guy tried to use less plates so that the lady won't need to wash so many of them, brings tissues around for us...

I am really encouraged by each one of them... i think i'm shortchanging them by describing them with one-liners. but i love their sincerity and willingness to serve. and i see facets of God in each one of them.... His love... His creativity... His beauty... providence... glory!

Thorns and Roses
Paul talked of a thorn in his flesh that doesnt go away. he cried and asked God to remove that thorn from him, but it wasnt removed. that thorn made him depend on God.

My friends had problems like sore throats, cough, diarrhea, etc... my thorn was itches. on the 1st or 2nd day, i was bitten by insects i think, i am not sure. but it hurt and swell for some time before it redden and itch like crazy. i couldn't rest at night because i kept waking up, and i was pretty worried that it'll affect my days ahead. so on the 3rd night i prayed that God'll remove them somehow... but if it's meant to be my thorn, and is meant to stay, pls help me to bear with it. He reminded me of His promise from 1 Cor 10:13, that "God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear." and I was really comforted knowing that He's going through this together with me. Jesus knows all sufferings, and so of course He knows what it's like to itch. heh. That night i slept well.

I was not bitten from that day onwards. So i only had to deal with the itches left by the previous bites. until....... day 9! i was bitten again on day 9. this time i had one swell that's right beneath my left foot. praise Him! because i only had 1 more night to go, and will be leaving in the morning in day 10. praise Him because i can't imagine how i can deal with those bites from day 3 to 8. i think i'll be irritable and impatient. and praise Him because i was made to depend on Him at this course....

Others
Before i left, i was told that i'll be so close to God during the trip, the real test comes when i am back in Singapore. Will i still depend on Him each day of my lives in every moment? On day -1, I wrote in my journal that i wasnt even sure if i'll be able to experience that closeness with God in the first place. thankfully, only by His grace, i was made to cling unto Him during the trip. i had no choice because i saw how faithful He is regardless of my weaknesses and inadequacies.

One of the aims of this trip was to witness and bless the people there, and share whatever we could share with them (because we have first been blessed so much!). i was counting down the days every morning every night like this:
"day 1. i have about a week here...
day 2. 7 more days...
day 5. only abt 4 nights and 4 days left Lord...
day 7. anymore chances in the next 2 or 3 days...
day 8. going back in 2 days...
day 9. last night here!"
heh. so when the day ends or starts i felt a sense of urgency because i knew i do not have much time there. we were focused and very clear, and thus each day was purposeful.

It's been a week since i came back. i've already lost the little tan i gained, gained the little weight i lost. the scars from the bites will take longer to heal, but i'm sure they will go off soon enough. i hope this trip will not be like that- a passing event, trifled and buried as a distant memory.

Let me learn to depend on Him every single moment here and everywhere... even admist my air con, lap top, warm clean water, food, and all my comforts. let me know and remember life's purpose each day... and live life. may all praise and glory be unto God!

"So whether you eat or frink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God." 1 Cor 10:31.

Some Things

One thing Not Nice:
i went for my first day of work near raffles place mrt. since it was my first day, i desperately needed to ask for directions. the first 2 persons i approached dismissed me with a sian hand wave even before i started speaking! and i deliberately chose those 2 because everyone else was walking past so quickly, while they were just standing around. i am not sure if they think i was trying to sell things or do some surveys, but i wasnt even holding anything! bleah.... i think people in orchard are friendlier...

i dont' like it when people are cold... is it just a part of urbanisation? i hope when i go to work next time i wouldnt change to be like that... but i think it's easy for anyone of us to fall into that trap amidst all the competition and chaos.... that trap of just caring about my own business, and not caring about anything or anyone else anymore...

One thing Nice:
i was at tiong bahru mrt this time. was going up the escalator when this boy rushed past. he looked about 9 years old. behind him was another lady who was trying to catch up. the boy was saying "bu yao, bu yao! bu yong jing!"/ "don't! don't need!". he was carrying loads of plastic bags. and the lady, which i presume is the mom, kept saying "hen zhong! tai zhong le! gei wo na, ah boy!"/ "its heavy! it's too heavy! let me carry them, ah boy!". and the boy jus kept running up, and the mom just kept running up too. while both kept repeating what they said.

heehe......what a considerate pair! the boy is so sweet!!! the mom is so thoughtful!!! both think of the other's needs first before their own's.... i like them!!!! haha..... it's really heartwarming to see that.... =)

Complete

taken from Complete
by Parachute band.

"So I lift my eyes to You Lord
In Your strength will I break through Lord
Touch me now, let Your love fall down on me
I know Your love dispels all my fears

Through the storm I will hold on Lord
And by faith I will walk on Lord
Then I'll see beyond my calvary one day
And I will be complete in You"

some days i forget...
He completes me. =)

Child's Play

shine or flicker above
the withering wick

below

is

where

the wind fickles as she likes.
she doesn't listen.

seasons may change
and fires die

but the wind pleases
till its time.

tickles and ticks
that child plays with tricks.

oh

it's not supposed to be so.

my dear

shine or flicker above
the withering wick

the wind says hello
shine like halo
as long as the former lives.

Summer's Rain

i miss blogging!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
haha....
been itching to write much sooner, but i keep telling myself i SHALL NOT blog till exams are over. and the fact that you are reading something new means tt this is it. exams ARE over. phew... =)

one day after my last paper was the start of a wonderful 3-days retreat with some wonderful pple with one wonderful God.

three days after the last day i am sitting in front of my laptop once again typing at this very moment. wondering what else there is to be said and done. well there's much...
may i use this time wisely.

it's summer hols! =)

Israel is Shameless, So am I.

"they say, 'if a man divorces his wife,
And she goes from him
And become another man's,
May he retun to her again?'
Would not that land be greatly polluted?
But you have played the harlot with so many lovers;
Yet return to Me," says the Lord.
-Jeremiah 3:1

i can't help but cry when i read this... i have played the harlot so many times.... been unfaithful so many times.... turned away so many times... yet He still waits for my return.

i am so ashamed at myself... but praise Him who is faithful.

Blessed

hey james, thank you for blessing me and for just being there...
i think you were God-sent yesterday. =)

thank You Father for sending Your blessings through a brother! =)

Lince Laughed Today

i take a walk today.
and He still walk besides me.
holds my hand.
refuses to let me go.

the wind breathes, sooths and
balms my heart.

the heat is a little discomforting, but its warmth
heals my soul.

i said, "i love the maker of it all!"
and He stopped walking.
laughed suddenly.
and guess what, i stop to laugh at myself too.

it's been a while... =)

Like Eating Lemon

of the things i need to let go.
of the things i feel you need to let go.

Dear Girls, A Prayer.

"Lord, I pray for a man, that will be a part of my life
A man that really loves You more than anything
A man that will take me in the second place of his heart
A man that lives not for himself but for You
Face and physical attraction aren’t important
The most important is I want a heart that really loves and has a thirst of You
and has a desire to be like Jesus

And he must know for whom and for what he lives, so his life isn't useless
Someone that has a wise heart, not only a smart brain
A man that not only loves me but also respects me,
A man that not only can adore me but can warn me when I'm wrong
A man that loves me not because of my beauty but of my heart
A man that can be my best friend in every time and situation
A man that makes me feel like a woman when I beside him

I'm not asking for a perfect man, but I ask for imperfect man
So I can make him perfect in Your eyes.
A man that needs my support for his strength
A man that needs my prayer for his life
A man that needs my smile to cover his sadness
A man that needs my love, so he could feel beloved
A man that needs me to make his life perfect

And I also ask ... make me a woman that can make him proud
Give me a heart that really loves You so I could love him with Your love,
not love him with only my love
Give me Your gentle spirit so my beauty didn't come from outside but came from You
Give me Your Hands that I always be able to pray for him
Give me Your eyes so I could see many good things in him and not only the bad one
Give me Your mouth that is filled with Your words of wisdom and encourage
So I could support him every day
Give me Your lips that I could smile at him every morning

And I want that when finally we met
Both of us could say
How great Thou Art that
You give me someone that can make my life so perfect
I know that You want we meet at the right time
And You will make everything beautiful in Your time
Amen. "

thanks kristia for the email! heh. duno who wrote it though...

erm i dun fully agree with one tiny part... about a man who needs me to make his life perfect, and about someone who can make my life perfect... it's both true and not true i think... ultimately, my life is perfect because of God. and his life should be too. =P
still.. i like the prayer... heh. happy belated valentine's!

1 Feb 2006

Today is a bad day.
not exactly. hmm... how should i put it...
it's good initially, and it's good most of the time. but when there's that one moment that's bad, it spoils the whole day.

i think i'm too sensitive.

one hour ago i jus feel like running away. from that one thing that doesnt go my way...
i think we all do feel that way at one point of time or another, don't you? to just run and hide... if you never felt that way before, good for you.

then i thought, one bad thing out of many good is pretty okay actually. maybe because i have alot of good things already, so there need to be a balance or smtgh. we lose some, we gain some right? for eg. a gal who has pretty eyes may has stubby fingers. or like a guy who has career but has no family. or like a person who has good grades, but has no friends. or another who is rich, but has no purpose in life.

so maybe, since i'm happy with so many things already, it's right that i should be given some things that make me unhappy. maybe some Higher Being above (whoever you believe in), a Force, Fate, something beyond us has got everything planned, and has everything balanced out. like the wheel of fortune in Julius Caesar, or like karma where good and bad revolves ard depending on our deeds.

i believed in a lie for a moment.
the God i know is not like that. He doesnt bless me for one day, and curse me another. He doesnt have mood swings. yes, bad things do happen. but God does not give good things, so that He can give the bad things later. Neither does He give the bad, then leave the best for the last. He doesn't toy around with our lives. He is not playing a joke on us. He also does not give something, then take away another thing for a return. God does not calculate profits from us. He does not need to. Jesus certainly did not expect a return when He gave His life for us. what can we give in return anyway? our lives? it's nothing compared to His. He simply gives because He is good.

I felt sucky jus now. But I'm glad i felt that way. it led me to remember something that's so easily dismissed as passe- God is a good God (no matter how i feel).

There is None Like You

taken from Michael W Smith's.

"i could search for all eternity long
and find
there is none like You."

*sigh... contented* =)

rythm is good. it keeps you running
and running,
running and
running and
running and
running.
that's bad.

know when to stop.

Wind and Confusion

there can be only 2 reasons if i take so long to blog...
1. There is nothing happening.
2. Too many things are happening.

I'm at option 2.
this draft consist of so many phrases accumulated for the past 2 months!

when alot of things happen... I sometimes think alot. And when I think alot, sometimes my thoughts are all condensed and they try to expand themselves. sometimes they pop, sometimes they brew. sometimes both happen at the same time. when that happens it gets tricky because i'm not sure if i should try to let these thoughts flow quickly in case i lose that train, or try to slow them down in case there're too many undeveloped ideas... what a pity if i were to merely pass them by!

so i'm going to cut and paste the rest of the phrases to a next draft. and i'll try to write more regularly... and hopefully be able to convey better the many wonderful things of one.

hAppY cHRisTmAS.... and MeRrY nEW yeaR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

haha.... =)